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As I spend the last days of summer here in Greece, the pomegranate seems to be everywhere, alluding to Persephone’s annual journey to the Underworld. They are ripening on trees in my aunt’s yard, they are hanging with bells from tourist shops, they are speaking to me with bittersweet memories of childhood.

As a little girl attending the Greek Orthodox Church I had mixed feelings about the monthly memorial services chanted in memory of loved ones who died. On one hand it made me cringe as it always extended the Sunday service by at least 20 minutes, on the other hand, I eagerly awaited the prize at the end of the service- koliva (boiled wheat with raisins, almonds, powdered sugar and pomegranate seeds given to the congregation by the family of mourners.) What a delicious treat!

I think about my own life, and this year, the story of Persephone, her journey into winter, seems more relevant than ever. These have been a hard few years for the family, with several devastating and untimely deaths, and a sense of profound loss permeating every family gathering. With all of the mnemosyna (memorials} on the horizon, and the coming of autumn weather I think of koliva, and of course, pomegranate seeds.

The wheat symbolizes the cycle of life and death, the sugar for the sweetness of the memories of our loved one, and the pomegranate seeds, representing the soul’s descent into Hades. I decide to do a little research: “the association between death and life, between that which is planted in the ground and that which emerges, is deeply embedded in the making and eating of koliva.” This ritual, which is performed in Orthodox churches all over the world- from Greece, to Russia, to Syria, to Ethiopia, to the US, has it roots in early pagan beliefs and practices- not a surprise!

 As an adult I am suddenly interested in the things I took for granted as a child. With a little further research, I learn that the word mnemosyno originates from the name of the goddess of memory, Mnemosyne- not really news. But what really resonates right now is what I learn next- Mnemosyne was the mother of the nine Muses. Here, the ritual, the onset of Fall, the story of Persephone in Hades, the eating of koliva all come together for me.

Perhaps it’s my age, or the season, or my circumstance, but I have been reflecting on how essential the Pause, or the fallow season, is to creativity, authenticity, and vitality. And how interesting that Memory is the mother of the Muses. When we look at fruit tree in winter, there is little to show that it is anything other than dead. But underground, countless microbes, insects, and worms are busy turning the soil, fixing nitrogen at its roots, building a reserve upon which luscious fruiting may build. So, we find that Demeter’s grief, her tears, as necessary as they are, contain the seeds of celebration.  In Hades, Persephone has become sovereign. She is now a queen, finding in the barrenness of the Underworld her own power.

The pomegranate invites us, as we grieve, as we draw on sunlit memories, as we savor the last of summer, to receive the gift of the darkening days and to discover our own sovereignty, as did Persephone.

“We must find out how to get everything back into connection with everything else. We must resist the vice of intellectualism, and get it understood that we cannot only understand” – Carl Jung (1959)

Many of us go about our lives, crossing off to do lists, being our best self, planning the next thing. We know what to eat, the best exercise for our body type, the latest therapy, or supplement. We know what to eat, we buy organic, we recycle, and we try to plan at least one vacation a year. We do all of these things, treating our life as a Sisyphean project.  At times we may feel that our life seems a bit empty, our struggles colossal or meaningless., or both! How can this be, when we are doing all of the right stuff?

Perhaps we are forgetting our most fundamental aspect of self- that of being part of the interconnected web of life. We are grasping for something, and yet we are already there! Without any effort, the truth is, by simply being, we are connected to the pulsing, changing, vibrant web of life on this earth. Taking time to connect with nature is essential to our well-being. We evolved as an interdependent species on this planet and we remain so.

Is it the wonderful comforts, engrossing challenges, exciting projects and ongoing missions that simply cause us to forget? They are not bad or wrong- who isn’t appreciative of indoor plumbing? Or providing for our loved ones? Or being our best self? It’s just that part of us yearns to feel our connection to the larger whole. Our hearts, brains, and bodies are designed that way, having evolved alongside countless millions of other flora and fauna. We share the endless parade of mineral and elemental exchange with our brothers and sisters, the glaciers, the sea, the mountains, the concrete, our cars- and yes, even our cell phones! Sometimes by simply sitting and noticing and getting curious about what is happening with that tree or that weed poking through the concrete or that bird whose song has changed, we get a glimpse of our own place in the cycle of life.  This has been celebrated by saints, mystics, and various cultural traditions all along.

Interestingly enough, science is catching up with what our ancestors and indigenous people have known for years- nature is a powerful force for emotional and physical healing. According to numerous studies, exposure to nature – even in small amounts, such as gazing at images or being exposed to indoor plants and greenery has been demonstrated to result in:

• Increased production of serotonin
• Reduced pain levels/reduced use of painkillers
• Decreased recovery time following surgery
• Reduced blood pressure
• Improved mood; reduction in symptoms and measures of stress, anxiety, ADHD, PTSD, addiction and more

How can this be? Perhaps our neural networks are designed to co-regulate with the natural world. Perhaps we notice and find comfort in the constancy of the cycles of the sun and the moon and the seasons.  It seems fitting that we refer to Gaia, our planet, as “Mother Earth” – always there, the foundation upon which we rest.  We can all benefit from taking the time to pause, notice, and remember, multiple times a day, every day.

Today, as I look out my office window here at Ruscombe Mansion, admiring the graceful lines of the tree below, I am surprised as dry leaves begin to flutter and take flight. These are not leaves! Gathered above, in perfect stillness, had been a host of birds sharing the afternoon with me. With unfocused eyes, I hadn’t seen them at all! These tiny birds got me thinking- what else am I missing?

With the pandemic ever looming, and this time of year, this deep January, when Spring is on its way but there’s scant evidence, it seems to me there’s much to learn from our feathered and furred friends about acceptance and endurance. Yes, they have prepared as best they can, and yes, they are opportunists extraordinaire, waiting for the moment when a food source appears, patiently digging, watching, and preparing for that purposeful moment of jumping into action.  But today, I am inspired by a different quality- a gentle abiding, in the midst of this cold and dreary stretch of winter. It feels like we, too, must be extra purposeful and aware to survive, and perhaps even thrive, during these long months ahead.

As new mandates and continued uncertainty abounds, I am recognizing in myself the need to create daily rituals that support my wellbeing. I am reminded of a wonderful message that circulated on the internet during the early pandemic. I don’t know the author, but it was simply titled: “Daily Quarantine Questions.” These questions remind us that even in the face of that which we cannot control, there is much we can do to cultivate meaning, connection, and personal agency. Here they are:

1. What am I GRATEFUL for today?

2. Who am I CHECKING IN ON or CONNECTING WITH today?

3. What expectation of “normal” am I LETTING GO OF today?

4. How am I GETTING OUTSIDE today?

5. How am I MOVING MY BODY today?

6. What BEAUTY am I either cultivating, creating, or inviting in today?

Living with the pandemic is hard. There is isolation, illness, frustration, and great loss. And yet, like these regal birds, we can face this season with gentle abiding and a connection to our own sovereignty. We can take sustenance from our deepest values and trust that when the time is right, activity will return at its natural pace. We are in the middle of learning new ways of being. Let us move forward with self-compassion, acceptance and possibility!

I am always amazed at how we can see our lives reflected in nature. Everywhere I look I see bright green, bursting with beauty and life, surrounded by the brown, the dry, and the dead. So, too, are we. Moving with purpose into new growth, and at the same time witnessing parts that no longer serve us. We can be grateful for friends, relationships, habits, and attitudes that helped us in the past. No need for shame, anger, self-loathing, or frustration. We, too, are part of the natural cycle. We move, change, and grow, and will continue to do so. Are there parts of your life that you are ready to let go of? People? Ideas? Self-images? Habitual ways of being? Acknowledgement is enough. As we bring these things to the light of awareness, they will naturally fall away- in their own time. Don’t push the river!